In order to help children cope with grief it is important to be aware of your own emotions. The expression of your own feelings will help your child to understand that crying or other emotions are part of a normal grieving process. How a child copes depends on:
Children may express their grief at unexpected times. When you least expect it, they may ask questions or have a need to talk about the person who died. Children are individuals and need to be given the chance to express their feelings of loss. You can help your child by talking about their relationship with the person who died, sharing favorite memories, drawing pictures, or writing letters. Worksheets are included within this packet to help begin this process. Another way to help your child cope is to allow them to participate in funerals, memorial services, or other rituals that bring comfort to your family. Although this can be emotionally difficult, it is important that children have the same opportunity as adults to say goodbye. Participating in funerals or memorial services can help children learn how to mourn, share their feelings, and continue the healing process. It is not unusual for young children to be distracted or unable to sit through a funeral. This may be a time to be more sensitive to your child’s individual needs, reactions, and coping behaviors.In addition, it may be helpful to have another adult available to assist your child during the service. Children may have many questions about this experience, therefore, it will be important to provide preparation and simple explanations prior to their participation. Depending on your child’s age or experience they might ask questions such as:
It is the responsibility of adults to provide the special attention, support, and education that children require to help them successfully cope with loss. This difficult experience will allow children to begin dealing with the realities of life. |